The First Thing

The First Thing - Esmee Denters

Baby talk to me
Can you tell me honestly
Am i crazy to believe somethings wrong
i can't read your mind
Can you give me a sign
Are you thinking things over
Or do you need some more time

"...feeling the butterflies in her tummy once again." My Facebook status. Talking about my love life in my blog is a bit daunting for me. I don't know everyone who reads this, sooner or later (but hopefully never) the word might reach his ears. It's not that he doesn't know about it, 'cause he does; it's just that...sometimes being in love can seem to be the most ridiculous thing ever.

Yet who am I to deny it?

I can't just say no to something so perfectly obvious. I can't hide the simple fact overgrowing my own pride. I can't. And after a few months being away, then seeing him again...I think I lost my heart once again - to him. Or rather, it never really came back to me...Oh by the way, I actually enjoy this song :)

i got my feet on the ground
but you keep my heart in the clouds
And everyday you the first thing i think of is you
And every night i wanna kiss you i wish you were feeling it too
And every dream is all about you
Without you im lost
Baby your everything that i want

Tell me what do you feel
i need to know if this is real
Every time you close your eyes, is it me you see?
i can feel you all around me
Let me know what's it gonna be
Cause i can be all that you need

i got my feet on the ground
but you turn my world upside down
And everyday you the first thing i think of is you
And every night i wanna kiss you i wish you were feeling it too
And every dream is all about you
Without you im lost
Baby your everything that i want

it doesn't have to be this way
there's so much more that we can say
i need to know that you want me to stay
You know i wanna stay

The first thing
The last thing
i think of
is you

Hey Ho! We're 1 Big Family!

It began, once upon a time, in 2008 when a plainly bored daughter said to her mom, "Ma, I want a homemade steamboat dinner - and let's invite the cousins!"

...yes, I was sitting my ass at home all year round last year and hey, it was fun! I was babysitting my niece and I love every moment of it although I did have to sacrifice a few of my daily afternoon naps...so I did what I did - went shopping at CKS and called my closest relatives, Mom's sister and family to come one Sunday evening. Gatherings were always on Christmas back then. But I wanted something else. I wanted more gatherings because I love the very air of having everyone around, laughing and bringing up old stories, reminiscing the past when everything was safer, cleaner, more fun. We can't afford extravagant gatherings now but I'm keeping it in mind that when I have a job, I will treat them with a better gathering once in a while. Why? Because I love my family. I love to see everyone being close with one another, sharing priceless moments.

Of course, apart from my family and cousins, we would invite our neighbour, Uncle Denis and family and also G and his family *wink* Then we began to have the altar servers come because I see them as a part of the beloved and so, they should come. Besides, they're friends with my little sister anyway and actually are related to us.

There are three types of gatherings we would host at home - (1) just my family and my aunt's including Alex and Xander (2) the family, my aunt's and Uncle George's and (3) a praying gathering. I try to get G and his family involved in every gathering if possible.

Last night, we had gathering # 1 but G can't make it since his sister visited them. I miss him...and maybe that's why I wasn't really in the mood. Still, I plan to have another one with him and family, just them. And another casual gathering with the families in June :D

Till then,
-tcxo-

BFF-S ♥

It's Wednesday and typically, it's an all-girls' day out. Except that we stayed indoors today. Actually, I thought we were going to watch the anticipated Angels & Demons movie...Thankfully, I can always download it later.

There were only four of us - Drey, Lc, Gurl and I since San2 is having her exam. We watched "the Uninvited", at least a quarter of it before having breakfast cum lunch together. Drey had to leave around 1.30pm to accompany Maverick for his interview. They're such a sweet couple of four years now (and counting) ♥ Wishing Mave the best of luck for his interview! Although I don't really talk much to him, he's like family now, a brother, since I love my girls so much and they're family - literally. We are all related some way or another anyway *wink* I just tend to automatically not converse much with my girls' boyfriends out of respect for them :D

Long story short, we had fun really. Out of the blue, Gurl went like, "Yot! I wunna do a makeover on you!" And then my head went, "Oh boy, here we go again..." I don't like make-ups and not all are allowed to apply them on me 'cause I'll get defensive about it. Gurl's one of the very few who I trust enough and allow them to. So she took out her magic makeover kit - or case - whatever it is called and started to do her work.

We were talking about wavy hairs earlier and digital perms so the curler came out and my hair got a makeover too. A woman seriously has a far more complexed life than a man. I mean, all those make-ups and slacks and jeans and shirts, tops, dresses, bags, handbags, heels and the world of female accessories! Passing by them whenever I go to the malls with my friends and family is enough to give me headaches for the entire day!

I admit, I am not one who excels in those kind of expertise. I leave it all to my girls.

So, Audrey came back and we started goofing off with Gurl's Macbook (Damn! I so wanted this one - tho' I'll be satisfied with a white Compaq if they do sell one. I just love white gadgets. They're so mesmerizing - for me at least.) The Photo Booth for Mac is so fun! Of course, my YouCam is not bad either :)

Back to my hair, I do want to get it curled. Maybe after next semester as I am determined to save up money (and this time I mean it like hell). I know it's the in-trend for the Chinese and Japanese women now (or maybe like forever since they've been wearing either straight or curly hair for ages). Straight hair is elegant and curly waves? Sassy!

But I still need to do a research on it - to see whether it fits me or not. Here are some pictures after the makeover:

Here's to my girls - best friends forever ♥ and because they're sisters too. Gurl's flying to the UK today - bon voyage! Have a safe trip :D and thanks to her, Drey and Lc for the wonderful time today! Hopefully next time, San2 will be with us.

F.R.E.A.K.

If there is anything - anything I say - in this world that has successfully owned a part of my pathetic human brain, it is the ever expanding game(s) of the Sims! Well, that, and a very particular guy...of which I know won't be leaving his spot in my head/heart anytime sooner or later :P

Right from the first series I have been an avid fan of the game (all hail Will Wright!!). Back then when the Sims were in 2D, I bought every expansion packs they had in stores. Those were the days when downloading wasn't an option for a little kid...Come the second generation of the Sims, the Sims 2 was a much improved version of its predecessor, now in 3D. Again, I bought the originals and *cough cough* actually started to download a few of its latest expansions - and yes, I have them all.

What was it about the game that hooked me up? I'm not really sure because frankly, if you played it with the typical routine (create a Sim, *cheat, maximize skills, *cheat, get married, have babies, etc. yadayadayada...) it will get boring in like, 30 minutes. Still, I'm addicted (a goody confession!) to it. Of course, I don't always cheat in the game - I only do that when I'm daydreaming of my dream house.

It's a good game because:-
1 - You get to play God :D at least on the poor creatures called Sims, which is actually fun
2 - You get to pretend you're an infamous architect cum interior/exterior designer, armed with a super-advanced technology to satisfy your customers and to help you bag the cash
3 - You get to pretend you're a 5-star movie/video clip director
4 - You get to test that script stashed away for ages
5 - You get to live your own life the way YOU want it
6 - It's all about creativity!

On a personal basis however, the game gives a good peek on life. Looking from above (the PC screen), we get to see how those poor, demented creatures have to work hard to get to the top and when they do, it's about time they should retire. Time really flows. Education alone won't get you nowhere without the proper skills and vice versa. Thieves get caught. Adulterers suffer. Neighbours complain of loud music and wild parties. And there is the possibility of extraterritorial beings somewhere else in the universe...

...and then there's the Grim Reaper to take it all away.

Unless you cheated on the game.

Speaking of which, the upcoming successor, the Sims 3 will be out on June 5th 2009 and yours truly is very excited about it!

Home Sweet Home

I've been procrastinating. Again. Come to think of it, it's not that I don't want to post anything...I've very good reasons why I didn't:

1 - My notebook crashed, just a day before I board the plane last Sunday.

2 - Reason # 1 explains it all.

Some important stuffs were kept in the notebook. The 50Gb worth of MP3 albums and muvees were out of reach then, and so were some other personal, VI stuffs *cough cough*. Luckily, the brother's PC still votes in my favour. After a week of mourning and procrastinating over my notebook, I tell myself I might just as well blog. But seriously, blogging from this very PC has many temptations in store for me - I tend to be downloading instead of blogging :P

Ah, well, I'm just trying to make up for the lose.

Oh! I almost forgot! Reason # 3 for my blogging procrastination - I don't have a memory card reader (mine was crappy so I tossed it away) and am waiting for the cable from my sister just so I can download hundreds of photos from the camera to my trusty external *three cheers for the external HD for never letting me down*

P/S: To my cousin Phil, the photos you asked for are coming soon - hopefully!

SKST Sports' Day 2009

[A delayed update.]

I was a student of SK St. Theresa where Mom is a teacher and I felt very honoured when they asked me to be the photographer for the day. They sent me an official letter from the school.

Frankly, I was pretty much distracted so I didn't get a lot of good pictures, not by the scorching midday heat but by something else. 95% of the teachers are familiar to me as I have known them since I was a child. I don't really recognize the students though - only a handful of them. The event lasted till midday, of which I was glad of. It was fun to see all the kids running around (must have contracted that from G). It was a bit dull but I can't expect much. I know the school too well. Still, I loved capturing every moment of it. It really did bring back memories :)

(1) The primary school (2) Best friends: Tchrs. Kris, Rosa & Rosalind

Olahragawan Alexander & olahragawati Geladine (dunno how to spell her name :P)

Mom and Mdm. Quah (she's a very nice teacher)

The victor house :D

Yes, Indeed.

After what seemed to be ages on foreign land...

I AM HOME!!

Need I say more? *wink*

*Updates later - after I've settled in to the comforts of a comfy bed. Nothing, yes, nothing smells better than the air of being at home*

Something About Us

Study wise, I don't feel like revising at all right now. Yes indeed, yours truly is bound for home this very Sunday. It's a call for a celebration!

*cough cough*

Truth is, something has been bothering me...for those who know them (a safe bet of less than 5 do), only Luc and Dean have been with me in campus. Gabe's nowhere to be seen - which makes me wonder...and worry too.

Have I done or said something, whatever, wrong? I miss my dear, dreamy Guardian...where oh where has he gone to?

Back to earth, yes, I'll be home soon. I'm eager. I'm nervous. I'm excited. It's been a while since I've seen everybody and I wonder how they have been doing amidst my absence. Certainly, I would really love to meet Nyon2 and Didun again...and G.

Speaking of which, I doubt my feelings for him has even wavered a bit. It's as strong as ever, growing everyday...still, I can't help but be anxious of my returning home and meeting him once more. How would he see me now, now that I'm a university student? Would I still be that little sister he knew from years back? Or the clumsy childhood friend who was too oblivious of her own feelings for him?

Coming home is one thing. To be seeing G again is another. It does make my heart goes whoop-a-di-da!

Frankly, I miss him. I like him, as in like more than like. I love him.

As if he doesn't already know that...he, who has always been aware of that fact.

I can't wait to be home :D but first...

...I need to do some revision!!!